The Wonderful McFroogleBurger


  1. First catch your McFroogle.
  2. Gralloch your McFroogle:
    • Using paramedic shears, snip through the customary ritual infibulatory sutures;
    • Using an oversized corkscrew with vigorous elbow action, eviscerate through the aperture thus obtained;
    • Set aside the abomasum and secondary hepatic plexi for a nourishing soup.
  3. Boil for sixteen hours in its own blood.
  4. Flay by ablation (the conscientious chef will of course keep an industrial belt-sander to hand).
  5. Using a nine-inch boning knife, despatch the McFroogle:
    • Insert knife into its primary neurotic cortex (a mallet may be useful at this point);
    • Apply 450V three-phase to (respectively and simultaneously) the optical reticulum, cortex via the knife, and cloaca. Avoid reflexive eversion of neurotoxic spines as skin contact may cause irritation.
    • Strike repeatedly with weighted implement.
    • Place in weighted metal dustbin out of hearing-range of customers until death-spasms subside and rigor mortis is evident (no corneal nictation on application of boiling water)
  6. Wipe off superfluous mucilage, place between fresh wholemeal buns. Garnish with parsley.
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Topic revision: r2 - 2020-08-30 - TWikiAdminUser
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